Last night, as a reflection of my exciting night life, I was faced with a difficult choice. Should I watch re-runs of Sex and the City, or watch a dead body extraction and the subsequent investigation on CSI. Something about murderous psychopaths was more appealing so I chose the latter.
I really didn’t fancy sitting through another re-run of Sex and the City because, as much as I enjoy watching it for the New York City setting, the fashion and the like, sometimes I find the characters and how they are portrayed a bit annoying. They seem to send a message that women should be needy and only be complete when they have found the perfect man. The theme is that a woman’s career is less important than finding and keeping the man. CSI, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to discriminate between boys and girls when it comes to chopping up bodies, whether it be a career in being the chopper or catching them. And as a bonus it was all going on in New York City.
The Sex and the City characters frustrate me because the story line is, more often than not, based around the premise that life is never going to be complete until they find the right man. Then when they do it’s ok to drop their own life and follow what the man wants, regardless of how much they valued what they may be giving up. The character Miranda (the one who was the lawyer for those of you who don’t remember…) put her work, which was obviously very important to her, above being in a “perfect” relationship and she seemed to get a constant hard time about it from her friends and partner. It was like placing a high value her career was wrong, although to her it was a very major part of who she was. Apparently she should slow herself down and fit in with her husband, no mention that he should step up and try and be part of hers too (even more irritating in this case because he was an whiney sap!).
Why do we feel its acceptable for a woman to give up her lifestyle and leave her friends behind if it is to have babies or follow a man, but not if it is because she is working to build a career for herself. There are some careers that if you want to achieve a certain level it takes putting in long hours. And if that’s what you want to do then why is that less acceptable than making sacrifices for other life choices. If your job is really important to you and you love doing it, is it really a bad thing to work a lot? I don’t think so. If it is something that means a lot to you, is it wrong that you are working instead of doing what other people want or expect? No. Anyway who says putting a lot into your career means you can’t have a satisfying relationship and be a good parent, because it isn’t just spending lots of time with your child that makes you a good parent.
Til next time…